Tuesday, August 30, 2011

Me.

" Be who you want to be,
not what others want to see"


Oh my word, Utah was simply amazing. That week was seriously the best and I did NOT want to come back home. haha It was so nice to get out and have time to focus on what I need to do. Time to figure out my plans once again. Time to be myself...time to FIND myself.

One day my Uncle Matt took me to the Massage College up there to get a free massage. (Which was AMAZING. haha) Anyways, a few of my family members have been through the program and my Uncle knows the people there pretty well so we were talking to them after. Then he asked if I wanted to get info about the school. (he is trying to get me to move up there.) I said alright and I went in to talk to a lady, Andrea, about the school.

Let me tell you, she was seriously amazing. Honestly. I have not had someone be so straight forward to me about my future ever. She said so many things to me that were so spot on and that I needed to hear. She told me that she could tell I was determined but that I have been fed so much B.S. that my mind is all chaotic. She got all that truth and more...just by looking at me. How in the WORLD did she know all that? You want to know how? I'll tell you, the Lord works in mysterious ways. We can find answers to our prayers in so many ways. The scriptures...a feeling...through other people. Its just unbelievable.

I have found out this year that I love blogging. I have been terrible at keeping a journal and I need to get back to it. BUT I found that I am able to express a lot more feeling through this, through my writing.

So anyways. She was the nicest person. She gave me SO much great advice, the biggest hug, and her cell phone number if I ever needed someone to talk to. Meeting wonderful people like Andrea is such a blessing. Everything she was telling me was fantastic. She told me to stop listening to everyone else and listen to what my heart is saying. (then she goes "I know that is cheesy, but its true! haha) Ah. There is just so much to talk about.

I am finding myself a little more everyday. I am figuring out my plan, my future, my destiny. In no way, am I perfect. In no way, do I have it all together. In no way, am I completely confident in anything right now. But thats okay because everyday is a new day. A new day to learn, to grow, and to become all that I am meant to be. I have realized that dreams may fall apart but it is because there is a bigger and better dream to be dreamt. I am dreaming big, I am going for my goals, and this is my time. This is my time to make mistakes, learn who I am, and learn to not be afraid of the unknown. All things in time will work out. I believe it! I will find myself and I won't be afraid of it. I'll be me, for me. I am not one to be what others want me to be. I will find my way. With the Lord's help, I will find my way.

Until Then.

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