Missing.

Days like I've been having just make me miss my best friend even more. I miss the hold-me-tight-until-I-felt-completely-better hugs when I needed them after a hard day or sad news.
I never thought missing someone could be so hard. I have missed people before, but this is somehow different. I never thought that AFTER the goodbye would be harder than the actual goodbye...and that was the hardest goodbye! There is only like one other person that I have ever missed like this too. I miss hanging out doing nothing but talking. I miss our beach trips, spa nights, and our top of the mountain nights. I miss just laughing at nothing and being complete spazzes. haha

Most of all, and the reason I miss my best friend a lot today, is because he would understand exactly how I am feeling and he is one of the only people that could make me open up and talk about whats going on. He would know what to say and what not to say. He would make me feel better. He might sugar coat the hard truth but thats what makes him different. He wouldn't just shoot down how i'm feeling. He would make sure I knew the truth but in such a caring way that just made sense to me. More importantly, he would just make me smile by the end of our conversation and not make me feel like I was bothering him or like he was trying to bring himself into the problem because thats usually why I don't talk about things to people, I don't like being a bother or a downer.

I just miss that guy. In case anyone is confused, I just miss my best friend. Its hard having him gone as well as a few of my closest friends too. Its definitely wierd being at this age where they all leave and so I can't wait to be at the age where they return.

I swear, the letters just don't come fast enough and 2 years sure can feel like forever some days but I know its for the best. AND we can still be there for eachother through those slow but great letters.

Until Then.