Peggy.

Oh, where do I begin...prepare yourself, this will be a long post. Well, last week was ROUGH. Everything hit me at once and Peggy was going downhill more and more each day. /:

So Peggy was THE most stubborn, strong willed, most loving dog EVER. Seriously. The last few years we kept thinking "We're going to have to say goodbye this time"...and then she would pull through, stronger than before. It just amazes me to think of how much she went through and was still here to give kisses, chase the cats, try to fetch still, etc. haha She was just so full of life, right up until the moment we REALLY had to say goodbye.

I remember going to get her. It was a friend of my Aunt's that had Peggy and was getting rid of her for whatever reason. I just remember going to this house and they had a few other dogs too but there was Peggy. I was SO excited. haha The car ride home was so funny. haha It was in our OLD blue van and Peggy would not sit down. I remember she just kept walking all over me and Robert, trying to see out all the windows, squishing us, and just being super hyper. It was great. (: That moment I knew I was looking at my new best friend. So that began the stream of memories I have now with her, my ENTIRE childhood had her in it. I am so thankful for that.

Some of my favorite memories with her:

-She HATED water. Therefore, being kids, we would throw her tennis balls into the sprinklers/slip n' slide/pool/etc. and watch her try to go get them! hahaha It was SO comical.

-She would EAT her tennis balls so the other dogs couldn't get them. haha She also ate chalk if we left it on the ground.

-Sleeping on the floor with her. (especially the last night)

-Giving her baths. That was always an adventure!

-Throwing one tennis ball, then she would bring it back, throw another one instantly and so on. Tired out us but she never seemed to want to stop.

-One time we found rats under the deck...Bear ate them...Peggy took care of them. haha

-Her insane barking as we jumped on the trampoline, she just wanted in on the fun. Then she got old and stopped barking until...one day, she just started howling and barking again! haha

-Feeding her my dinner when my parents left the room.

-She never liked to be stuck in one area for a long time. She got hurt one time so she was in the bathroom with a cone on while we went to church. Well, we got home to see that the cone was off, bandages were off, and the molding around the door was GONE. haha She had clawed and eaten it off.

-She was the ONLY dog I ever let give me kisses.

-When Tiger was around (my cat) he always snuck out of the house. Peggy would be after him so quick. haha He never got far. She was a good gaurd dog.

-When we rode our bikes out back, she would just chase us around.

-Taking Easter pictures, she was always right there.

-She LOVED cheese. haha I always loved giving her some.

-Her chasing the other dogs around the yard, acting like a puppy all her life.

I'll stop there. It is really good to see all those memories typed out. Ah. So here comes the hard part... My parents were both gone a few weeks ago. Me and Taylee couldn't see Peggy so we went out side. She was shaking and had fallen. That day was AWFUL. I thought I was going to have to say goodby right there and bury her myself. But that wasn't the end. That night I picked her up myself, made a bed on the kitchen floor, and slept right next to her all night. Although her hips were SO bad she tried to keep walking up until the last day. (even if it was just in circles.) Well when my Dad got home he talked about taking her in to put her down. I could tell that he didn't want to but being the strong father that he is...he knew it had to be done.

Thursday (June 3oth) Me and Tay gave her a bath. OH boy, that was an adventure! haha Like I said, she hated water. We tried to make it quick. She looked so pretty after. (: That night we brought her in, just to be in the house. I made a bed in the living room for me and her. It is like she knew what was going to happen, she would NOT sleep. So...I hardly slept either. I just couldn't help but to stare at her. Wonder what she was thinking, thinking about all the goodtimes...It was a LONG night. Friday (July 1st), was the day. I put her outside and cleaned up the living room. Dad and I were going to donate blood so we went to do that. (I had low iron AGAIN so I couldn't. /:) When we got back...it was time to say...Goodbye. Dad put her on a leash, brought her in, and I grabbed the camera. She never stayed still so I tried my best to get our pictures with her to be clear. (It was me, tay, and Dad at home. Robert, Mom, and Zack were at camp...that was SO hard for them not to be here.) After that, Dad took a picture of me with her and I just wanted to BREAK looking into those beautiful, tired, old eyes.

We got her to the truck but then realized she was going to have to be picked up and put in. I went and grabbed a blanket, back outside, picked her up, and put her on the seat. I didn't want to let her go. I sat there telling her I loved her, giving her kisses, saying goodbye, and then Dad said he had to go. As I shut the door...I just had to look away. I did wave and then in the house I went. Once I got in my room, I just BROKE. I don't remember the last time I cried that hard over anything. It was just this huge release and I just couldn't believe I had to say goodbye.

I composed myself and went downstairs. I posted the picture on FB with a little caption. I seriously wanted to just curl up and do nothing, cancel all plans for like ever and just sleep. BUT the lovely Charlotte J (Momma J) commented and said she was kidnapping me and my sister. I went back upstairs and laid down after that. As I waited for my Dad to call, I fell asleep, and woke up to hear the Johansen ladies in my house. haha They did come. AND I am so thankful. Tay woke me up, I grabbed a shirt, and went downstairs. Right then my Dad came home. With the leash, collar, and my blanket in hand. I went into the bathroom and tried to contain myself once again. He also told me the records showed, it was her birthday. She was 18. 18 years old! What a wonderful long life she had. I hugged my Dad and then we left. (p.s. that was SERIOUSLY a blessing, to get out and have a day away, that day away. I am so thankful for them. <3 Such a wonderful family.)

Peggy was such a blessing to my family and I. She always improved our moods, made us laugh, made us happy, and completed our family. When she got older I would wake up every morning, go straight to the back door, and just click the lock to make sure she woke up. The other day I did that, I guess I just made it a habit...now I gotta break it. I will never EVER forget her. I won't forget all the memories made with her. She was my entire childhood/teen life. Now that she is gone, I feel like that chapter of my life is finally over. I'm off into adulthood, no strings attatched. I love her SO much. Goodbyes are so hard. She was the BEST. I know that I will see her again one day. She will be there to greet me on the other side. With Tiger, Meeko, Blackie, Coco, Slinky, and all the other wonderful pets we have been blessed with over the years. That knowledge brings me great peace and joy. She is running and playing again. Free from her tired body and free from pain. Peggy, I love you. Always have, always will. I will see you again.

Until Then. <3